Progress Hindered By Lifestyle

Waiting for my medication to reach room temp. at 1:37am is not called taking care of yourself, folks. Alas, that is where I am. Too many late nights this last few weeks. I'm paying for it dearly. I hope I have enough left in me to make it to end of term with all my work done and my health in tact.

A change is coming. Just about every facet is going to be cleared and changed.

Details to come.

Recovery in Progress

Inner peace. Training the mind to conquer itself. Cultivate a higher sense of awareness. Mindful and disciplined. This is where we are calm, at rest. Empty of distraction. Focused, we move through our day.

Affirmations

1. I deserve to feel good.

2. I take care of myself.

3. I am a good person.

4. I am a healthy person.

5. I am a happy person.

6. When something goes wrong, I'll handle it.

7. I am capable.

8. I deserve to enjoy my time.

9. I feel safe and confident.

10. I can make a difference.

11. I am willing to take risks to grow and change.

12. I love myself.

what the hell is this???

I don't know what's happening to me, but it's scary.

This morning I was getting uplooking forward to feeling better and I felt really weak. Almost passed out and threw up. I spent the rest of the day feeling like I was going to be paralysed pretty soon and sick to my stomach. I can hardly walk and I still feel sick.

No fever, not much of a cough. My body has been shaking. I think the stress finally got to my MS. Like I need anything else at this point. This is the worst I've felt all week. Just when i was getting better. I don't know how I'm going to sleep tonight. I'm really anxious and I can't stop it. Something strange is happening. I don't want to go to the hospital again... I just can't.

What the hell is wrong with me??? Tell me this is just complication of my disease with the flu and my body needs an extra day or two to recover. When will this end? I can't feel my legs hardly. What the hell is it?

juz lucky I guess.

Scary morning. I had a very high fever and I was vomiting. I dehydrated pretty bad and ended up layed out on the bathroom floor covered in water to cool me down. So into the reginal I go. I knew dr farrell was going to be trouble. He barely looked at me and sent me home with a perscription last night that nearly killed me this morning.

But wait, here's the best part. I meet Dr Currie at the hospital, young doctor. Doesn't like the look of my dehydratioin so orders a liter of fluid for me through I.V. and something to get rid of the nausia. Which is fine excpet that it the same stuff that doctor in Victoria gave and made me coo coo for 30 min. Which by the way I'm still suffering from. Hopefully it won't last much longer. I swore I'd never take that stuff again... had I know what it was I would have refused it. Terrible.

Here is the best part. Tom, the nurse, couldn't get a vein to work to save his life. 3 really painfull holes in my arm later he finally got it. Collapsed veins are trademark of dehydration. This all makes me lucky I guess. :S:S:S:S:S:S:S:S

Make it stop.

I could be wrong

Fever is back. Yay. Hospital trip for me. :S

getting... better?

Fever is gone, I have a new problem. The worst headaches ever. Like migranes even. My nose won't drain so there is a lot of pressure up there. Tomorrow if I'm not better I'm going to the hospital, I have too much work to do to be sick still. I don't know if I can recover from where I'm at now actually. Anywho, some anitbiotics might clear this up. I try not to take them ever because I'm allergic to most of them and I want them to work for me when I need them. My head is too sore to type anymore.

Very Sick

Today was an aweful experience. I had a high fever today, for most of it. Just broke about an hour ago. It was as high as 39.5. I was really burning up. And that made all my MS symptoms worse. I went completely blind in my left eye from the heat, every hair on my skin, everywhere, including the whiskers on my face hurt like hell, and my muscles are stiff and sore all over. I'm getting a lot of pains in random places. To top it all off I'm really weak and dizzy and I have a really bad sinus infection. And a ton of school work to get done that I couldn't do today. Waiting for relief.

Very Sick

Today was an aweful experience. I had a high fever today, for most of it. Just broke about an hour ago. It was as high as 39.5. I was really burning up. And that made all my MS symptoms worse. I went completely blind in my left eye from the heat, every hair on my skin, everywhere, including the whiskers on my face hurt like hell, and my muscles are stiff and sore all over. I'm getting a lot of pains in random places. To top it all off I'm really weak and dizzy and I have a really bad sinus infection. And a ton of school work to get done that I couldn't do today. Waiting for relief.

Top five worst illnesses

I had a really bad flu when I was younger, that was no 1 by a long mile. Chicken pox was my no 2. MS related pains and fevers have nothing on this, that's why it's no 4. This is aweful. I don't think I fully explained to Shauna what this is doing to me. So much pain. I'm about ready to give up on everything until I'm healthy, I can't work like this... my figner tips hurt for christ sake. And as predicted my fever (102-3) has worsened my MS symptoms. SO now I can't see at all from my left eye and walking is certainly difficult. I'm shaking uncontrolably and each shake hurts like hell. Purgatory. This is where I am.

What's going around.

I just woke up and I knew from last night that I would be sick, and I am. I seem to have caught what has been going around. I thought I had managed to avoid the bug this year. So far it's just groggyness and a cough, my lungs are really congested. My voice is going but I still think I can get through rehearsal today, hell I can't afford to miss it again, James will kill me. Anyway, that the scoup. I'm sick, thanks Greg! haha. I buy him lunch and he gives me the flu.